another year, another WMC. Thank god it’s over. It turns parts of Miami upside down. I managed to avoid it for the most part. It was blowing up as I left downtown last night around 10:30. At least I’ve great parking should I have wanted to go there.
Today I assume the title of bridal assistant/handler for a company that I work with doing event planning. Let’s see how it goes. I’ll be back later, details to follow.
and by the way, whatever happened to the “ ¢” sign? It has disappeared from commonly used symbols.
So I’m bumping up my skin care line/regime/whatever and I’m moving onto organics and naturals. I’ve been making the transition over the last year as I’ve become more aware of not just what I eat and put in my body, but what I put on it. So I went to Ulta and Sephora. Sephora does have a better selection, but I was looking for a somewhat commonly sold line, the Bare Minerals starter set, so I knew I could find it at both. I wanted to find the best deal. Both had the same price. I also found Juice Beauty / Juice Organics for facial cleanser, moisturizer, etc. So I got a sample pack from the JB line to try it out and the starter kit from the BM line. I had a catalog coupon to save $5 off of purchase. I looked around online and found a coupon code for 20% off purchase, which after checking them both, wound up to be the better deal. I also received free shipping because my purchase was over $50. Deal !! After all was said and done and the tax was added on, which I didn’t realize I would have to pay tax, as I was mistakenly under the impression that internet orders were tax free, I wound up saving a whopping ¢.18 !!!
I went to check my gmail account yesterday and again, typing to fast, misspelled it in my address bar and wound up typing gamil.com, which turned out to be a pretty cool site. I poked around a little just checking it out. Found this which I thought was kind of original. Facemod, it’s a candlestick that is modeled after the profile of your face.
I spent I think about 4 hours on the phone with Alex V last night. I ran down my cell phone battery, then my hands free earpiece battery. Resorted to the landline, but had to set that down, as I decided (at 11 p.m.) to make turkey chili and needed both hands. We used to do that a couple of years ago, when we decided to kind of give dating a shot. It was a long distance kind of thing, but we were gonna try, since I wanted to move to California anyways. Our conversations now are kind of reminiscent of those then. The length, the frequency, etc. Some of the topics are becoming spicier. . . I like that we can have hours long conversations. I like that he is an intelligent converser. He plays guitar and piano for me over the phone, sometimes he’ll sing.
what a crappy ass day (weather wise) it is here, the day before Easter. It’s gray and rainy and blah.
So a quick update on Troy and the text. I texted him a couple of days ago asking if he would like us to pretend that the drunken, “I love you” didn’t happen? He replied back, “Not really . . .” I’m not sure what that means . . . .
I was going through some previous blog posts and decided to spellcheck them. I type too fast sometimes and make little mistakes here and there so I figured use the resource if it has been provided to you. I found it humorous that the word “blog” came up as a misspelling.
If you’re wondering about the “#15″ I didn’t have a title for this post and when I went to retrieve it finish writing, it had been saved as post or draft (don’t remember) #15 . . .so, #15 it is.
you should know about me, that i am (sad, so sad) obsessed with a few of those entertainment sites, like TMZ and Perez Hilton. I’m not sure why, I think it’s something from my childhood. My (biological) mother was a People magazine fanatic, so I was always reading them and they were around the house. I honestly couldn’t give a rat’s ass about most of the stuff on the sites, it’s entertaining to say the least. If I was a “celebrity/public figure” I wonder if I would be reading them with a fine tooth comb or if I’d be ignoring it completely. They can write some pretty harsh stuff on those sites and if it was about me, it’d probably be easier just not to look at it at all. I highly doubt whether most of what is written is valid or relevant, but again . . . it is entertaining.
So Alexi and I met up yesterday, it’s been a week since I saw him last. I was pretty upset with him about his way of handling an issue that he had lied to me about. I know we’re “just friends” and we have some “benefits” but I do have a lot of feelings for and care very much for him. I shouldn’t be as close as I have been with him since I don’t feel he’s the right one for me right now and I’m still planning on moving. I enjoy his company for the most part, and he’s so incredibly sweet. He’s pretty much where he should be for his age, but I’ve been there/done that and I need someone who is wiser/more experienced, not quite so naive and a little more worldly. I’m looking for someone who is in control of the aspects of their life and he’s not there yet. He’s in some ways . . . still a kid.
Our meeting was awkward. I couldn’t really look at him. We took Oakley to the park for a walk and played the, idle chit-chat / who’s going to bring it up first game. He still wants me to understand that his lying wasn’t meant to hurt me (they never are), blah blah blah, I told him I understood . . . .I just didn’t agree with it.
We discussed/argued/rehashed some more and then back at the house some more. I didn’t want to do it anymore, I was tired of it and a little emotionally drained. I told him a level of trust had been breached that I didn’t know could be repaired and I had to see how I would feel as time went on. I was hungry, he was hungry, we went to dinner. It helped ease some of the tension, that and the saké.
Check this out ! Seafair,”More than just a fine art fair, this luxurious, 228-foot megayacht – which remains dockside throughout each port visit – offers collectors and connoisseurs a new portal through which to view and buy major works of art from dealers of international caliber in the collector’s home community. “
I was told about a position that may be opening up, working on this “megayacht,” that I was encouraged to apply for. It is within a company that I already work for, so I would probably be given a slightly higher consideration. I do like and enjoy art . . .it would be a huge promotion, but I wasn’t looking for one. I might just apply for the hell of it, just to see what happens. Kind of funny how things have a way of turning out, when you don’t place as much importance on them, such as applying for it with no real expectations of getting it.
Too many things running through my head. . . .
Oh yeah, I have no hot water at my house, kind of sucks.
Today is the first day of spring. It is now raining, here in Miami. We’re expecting a mini cold front tonight.
I need to get my taxes done.
I have to go to work in a few hours.
I’m going to try to maybe see if I can see B tonight after work, he doesn’t know this yet. If I felt up to it I was going to call him at the end of my event and see what he was up to.
Might meet Alexi for beach yoga tomorrow evening. I need to get my camera and dvd’s back and give him his birthday presents, since I had already ordered them before our “little falling out.”
I have to pee.
I’m trying to find a hosting company for my website (to be). 1st something you should know about me, I like to do research. I like to learn as much as I possibly can before making a decision. This can be good and bad. Sometimes I do too much research and can’t make a decision. I am completely new to the hosting/design of a website, but I want to do it myself, so I’m figuring it out. I’ve read so much info, my head is spinning. I’ve narrowed the choices down and should just go with my impulse to just pick one already and get my site up and running. So far I’ve come across terms such as:
cpanel ?CMS?CSS ?RSS ?support wordpress? joomla?
type of account plan (shared/dedicated server, VPS)
. . . .and features galore, most of which I don’t completely understand. Why can’t they just have a layman’s term section where I can just ask it that I want the site to do this, this and this. Can you do it? Hmmm . . . .my font changed from that copy and paste I did up there with my terms.
I think I’ve narrowed it down to 3:
www.hostmonster.com
www.lunarpages.com
www.hostgator.com
There are bad reviews and good reviews, pros and cons, and features . . .. . so confusing!!
Does anyone have a recommendation or advice?
In 2006/2007 I used to work for the ACS(American Cancer Society), great cause, lousy Miami unit, bad management, huge disorganization. I was an underpaid overworked slave, event planner with them. I met a guy (we’ll call him Brian). He’s probably a great catch, went to law school, works in commercial real estate, seems like a good person in general. He was on one of my committees. He sent me roses on my birthday (2006). ACS and I parted ways, he asked me out. My friends and I went to a play at the Coral Gables Playhouse one night and met up with him and a friend afterwards at John Martins. I’m not exactly sure why but when he asked me out, it kind of freaked me out and I kind of disappeared. A good part of it was I was without a job, and I always feel insecure when I’m jobless. People place so much importance on what you do, instead of who you are. It’s one of the first questions we ask with someone new, I’m guilty of it too.
He texted me back in December (07) wishing me a happy birthday. I texted back (thank you) and I was leaving for out of town, but when I got back we should have a birthday dinner (his birthday is near mine). We wound up meeting up on Valentine’s Day of this year (08) by coincidence? timing? fate? He texted me Happy Valentine’s, and since my plans were cancelled a few hours before and his kind of never came to fruition we decided to meet up. So we met for dinner, hadn’t seen each other in about a year. Dinner was nice, I offered to split the bill, since we were meeting up as friends, he said no. We’ve been texting since, he’s been asking me out and I haven’t had nearly one night free since then. When I had a few nights here and there I had been spending it with Alexi (more on him later), all others I’ve been working. I know it seems ridiculous, that in one month, I haven’t been able to clear 1 night, but I’m working a lot to save up to move.
I had mentioned that Wednesday (tomorrow was looking like a possibility). Today when I got to work, they asked me if I could come in earlier than originally planned at 7:30 a.m., instead of 9:30. I texted him this and said, I might be zombie like by the end of my day, and maybe Friday? He texted back that his sister was going to be in town, but he would save Friday for me if that was the only time. Agh! I felt like such an ass !! I texted him that I was sorry and I know my schedule is manic. He texted back, “No need to apologize to me. Listen, I’m a patient man, especially when i think something of someone is worth the wait.” How much do I suck! Especially since I still have to tell him that I plan on moving in the next month or so (out of Florida). I don’t want him to waste anytime or feelings on me.
I must’ve poured over 100 green beers last night, and never got to drink one myself. I’m not distraught over it. I got some of the dye on my fingers and it’s still there this morning. I also licked my finger last night to see if it would come off . . .it did, on my tongue, where it stayed for a while. I can imagine the slightly panicked expressions on people’s faces as they got home and looked in their mirrors only to see green teeth and tongues looking back at them. (silently chuckling)
I have a p/t job working (bartending, hors d’oeuvres jockey) at our Performing Arts Center, The Adrian Arsht Center, formerly known as The Carnival Center. Miami needed another bailout and dear Ms. Arsht came to the rescue, so I guess Carnival(of Carnival Cruise Lines) who donated $20 million for honor of having their name bestowed upon it, kind of got a slap in the face and the building was renamed. I am a huge supporter and lover of arts so in all sincerity, thank you Ms. Arsht. Of course now because Miami being the place it has become has over done their PAC, that unfortunately, real regular middle class and can’t even imagine the lower income families, can really afford tickets to any of the performances. I get to see parts of performances which they broadcast on large flatscreens which are scattered around on the 5 levels. The images aren’t clear, but the speakers work pretty well. I was able watch the first act of Spamalot about 3 or 4 times, though never the end, because I was always cleaning up my bar and leaving. So to make up for it, I watched my DVD of Monty Python and the Holy Grail, to catch myself up on it.
I’m headed back to the PAC in a few hours for another event. It’s kind of an icky day today, for Miami, but it’s windy and I’m enjoying having the windows open and the breeze coming through the house. I should take Oakley for a walk. Some coffee perhaps to kick me into gear.
(originally written on March 15, but it took me this long to finish)
what ?!
“ i love you”
This is the (drunken I’m sure, but they say that’s when we’re our most honest) text, I receive at 3:20 a.m. last night, from my ex boyfriend/friend (we’ll call him) Troy. I didn’t see it until this morning when I woke up. A little surprising to say the least and ironic/funny in two ways: 1 – I just broke things off the night before with my current friend/boyfriend/boytoy . . . after a rather large and hurtful discovery and, 2 – Nearly the same thing happened a few years ago when Troy and I were dating, an ex of mine called me around 5 in the morning leaving me a drunken voicemail about how he still loved me.
A little about Troy and I . . . we met nearly 10 years ago when we worked at Cafe Iguana (a club in Miami) together. We became pretty good friends, he was finishing school to be a Physical Therapist. He was I guess you could say a serial dater. Always hooking up. I never thought of him as anything more than a friend. He did not look at me the same. He wanted to sleep with me. And I felt that was all he wanted of me (past a friendship), and I wasn’t interested in anything more than friends. He stayed with me for a few months back in 2000, when he back in Miami (following being out of town to test for his boards), and when I moved to Denver, he found his own place. We stayed in touch and he even came to visit me out in Colorado. We had a great time, (he still wanted to sleep with me, but I still was not interested). We eventually became pretty close, and talked nearly daily, even watching t.v. together long distance. MXC became one of our favorite shows to watch together on the phone.
So I was done living in Denver (time for change) and was getting ready to move (planning on California). Troy was doing a stint as a traveling P.T., he couldn’t find a job in California so he took one in Gainesville, FL. He asked me to be with him and we would travel together. I never wanted to go back to Florida, but thinking it would only be 3 months and I could go down to Miami on weekends to see my family who had been 2,000 + miles away for the previous 4 years, I thought it would work out. By the end of the 1st month, the relationship deteriorated, our sex life took a downward turn and I was miserable and depressed, living in some little hick college town, with no support system and the guy I was depending on to be my friend/lover etc. no where around. I also began to learn in detail about his drinking problem and had to begin reliving it with him now as someone closer than a friend. Troy and alcohol are a bad combination. He turns into a nasty nasty man. He is more of what you would categorize as a binge drinker, not an everyday drunk.
In the end after nearly 5 months and a Halloween Horror Nights trip to Orlando, where he spent the entire time flirting with and trying to hook up with his friend “Tracy – she’s just a friend but we fooled around sometimes when we were rolling, the lesbian, but occasionally is with guys” right in front of my face, I was completely unhappy and on the verge of becoming somewhat seriously depressed and to me it was pretty obvious he didn’t care, so I decided to leave. For a couple of days when I was home alone, I began to micro pack my belongings and one day while he was at work, I packed up my car and my dog and left. . . . . .He didn’t call. That was December of 04.
The next year we began to talk a little. A little became more and we were talking alot again. We got to the point where I was going to go out and visit him in Texas. I was pretty excited because there was a music festival, Austin City Limits, that was happening during the weekend that I wanted to go to. I had bought my plane ticket, and was looking at tickets for the concerts. I asked him to look for tickets there, which he kept putting off. Clue #1. Our rate of conversations dropped, Clue #2. He called about a week before I was supposed to fly out and told me that there was a girl he was seeing and he didn’t think it would be fair to her if I came out to visit him. . . . . .So there I was, stuck with a ticket to nowhere and a big bitter pill in my mouth to swallow.
Haven’t spoke to him since then. He’s called a few times . . . .I don’t answer. There’s been a few emails, and a few texts since then, but I learned my lesson. Hey you burned enough, you stay away from fire. And now, 2 years later . . . . .”i love you.” ?!?!?!?! What am I supposed to say to that? He called the next day, I didn’t answer. There’s been some texting back and forth. I asked him if that text was meant for me, who knows, maybe he texted me by accident and it was meant for someone else . . . his reply, “But if you don’t already know it, I always will love you . . . it’s not like I hate you just cuz things didn’t work out at the time in Gainesville.” (good because I was worried that you hated me – if you couldn’t tell that was serious sarcasm) ”I’m very, very, very sorry and I know an apology doesn’t make up for that stuff . . . . . 
” He wants to pay me back for the plane ticket and wanted to know my address. I let him know he could find it if he really wanted to do that, so we’ll see if I get anything in the mail.
